Being Pulled

Today I am being pulled in several directions. It’s up to me to find the path. As I go through the day, I constantly make decisions. In the end, some fall out better than others.

I notice that many decisions that I make are made by default. It’s not that I wait until a decision is forced. Instead, it’s that there are many things I might choose but I do what is habitual—I do it without planning.

I don’t like making decisions. A big reason is that they lead me to judge two or more options. Rather than have the answer up front, I must evaluate what works best for me. They also force my hand so that I lose other options.

It is paradoxical that while I like to have a lot of options, I don’t like to actually make a choice. I don’t know if this is a common quirk. However, I like it better when I must choose between several positive options. As I look across the field of what I can do, the possibilities can multiply exponentially.

When I have three choices, in addition to the positive of each one, there is an additional negative of not getting the positive that the other two offered. So, instead of just weighing the worth of each my mind, I can create more complexity.

It is just overthinking the situation. In practice, I never get that far into my head to decide. Often, I do the one that is closest or the one that is obvious.

By making many of my actions automatic, my mind is freer to do other things. It doesn’t always give the best results, but I can limit my consideration to the decisions that don’t have an easy solution.

If I dig deeply into my head about making a decision, I start to take life too seriously. As things become more of a challenge, I would benefit to keep my heart light. When I am deadly serious about my life, all decisions become harder. I worry about doing the wrong thing. I am concerned with what other people think.

I do best when I have a level perspective. Most decisions are not that important. Often the choice is something that just doesn’t matter.